I was filled with excitement this week. My week was busy and tiring, yet I couldn’t hold back the feeling that relief was on its way. For the first time in ages, I was looking forward to Spring Break. It is strange. I’m not going anywhere. I have no elaborate plans during the week. It is in fact going to be rather dull. I’m not even a student myself.
However, I’m going to be gifted a break from school. I’m being gifted a break from the anxiety, the fear and the anger that goes along with it. More importantly my son will be getting a break from those feelings as well.
It is only recently, I realized how much anxiety I hold each day my son walks into the school. I know he has the potential for great things, but I also know he has the potential to erupt into a fit of bad behavior. I jump at phone calls during the day. I clench at car pool waiting to find out his teacher’s report. Even emails sometimes make me skittish.
Don’t worry I have help. I also have coping mechanisms, but sometimes the reality of my life can just be a bit much. No matter how many miles I run, or friends I call for help, my son still might have a meltdown at school. I really needed this break. I now have to keep my son from having too much screen time. I have to monitor what snacks he eats, because he is a kid who likes sugar. I have to drag him reluctantly outside for some real exercise. Still all that pales in comparison to reading another email about how out of control E’s emotions were at school.
Here I have a small bit of control. I can see when my son is disregulated. Sometimes I can help him, sometimes I can’t. Still I can see if I lost my temper and it triggered my son, or it was just literally spilled milk. There is a relief in knowledge. I know his day. At school that isn’t always the case.
So it is time to remind my son to take a break from screen time and see if he’ll help me walk the dog. It is going to be a quiet Spring Break, but hopefully it will bring some relief to our stressful lives. Plus the dog gets more walks.
Happy Spring Break Wake County North Carolina and Beyond!